Tyler Clementi

A few weeks ago we heard the terrible and tragic news about a young college freshman, Tyler Clementi, from Rutgers University who committed suicide after his roommate had revealed and made public an intimate relationship Tyler had had. Some positioned that this was a misuse of modern technology and social networking gone bad; some said that it was homophobia; most agreed that it was an invasion of privacy at the very least. I am not sure of the accused's intentions, and as of now, neither is the prosecutor's office. No doubt the invasion of privacy was caused young Tyler to fall into despair.


Certainly, there was more to Tyler Clementi's background that this caused him to react so drastically. He probably was struggling with many things and his sexuality was, no doubt, one of them. Perhaps he was never really able to discuss with someone what was going on in his life.


What I found as troubling as anything was that after his suicide, there were many Rutgers students interviewed who lived near him in the dorm, and only three had stated that they had had a conversation with the young student. Only three! Yet on the evening of the vigil that the students and faculty held in his memory and honor, 700 or 800 students attended. Many showed up to remember him, which was kind, but I wonder how many were there to support him or love him before the terrible tragedy.


One of the great examples of Christian living we can show is a willingness to be kind to others. Offering a word of encouragement, a gentle "hello" or a simple smile to those that we might not know so well. For some who receive this kindness, it could make all the difference in the world. Jesus spoke to people he didn't know; Jesus listened to people when they spoke; Jesus asked those in need what he could do for them. Perhaps, this kindness might have been the difference between life and death for Tyler Clementi. Rest in peace, Tyler.

Fr. Marc A. Vicari